Phone boxes and webs
by The Scarlet Pumpernickel 2.0
Summary: The Doctor meets Spider-man. Enjoy and review. K for some violence!
1. Chapter 1

_**Phone boxes and webs-**_

This is my first Spider-man fanfic and my first Doctor Who fanfic too! And the first one that's not supposed to be funny! That's a lot of firsts. So... here goes. But first some info.

Summary- The Doctor appears in New York (home of our friendly neighborhood Spider-man). To discover something odds going on. There's a guy swinging around in tight spandex and some links to Torchwood. (So I guess it's also a Torchwood one).

Pairings- Maybe I'll have some... or maybe not. I don't know yet.

Note- In this fanfic the Doctor is traveling with Rose and Captain Jack Harkness (if anyone can explain his past to me I'll give them invisible candy).

I know that the 9th Doctor (Eccleston) Rose and Harkness traveled together so that's canon. But in my story it's the 10th Doctor (as in Tennent). And in case I get people complaining I do know that the 10th Doctor Rose and Harkness never traveled together but I don't care! So flame me at your own risk! Basically what I've done is that at the End of Parting of the Ways Jack stays with them (image Jackie's face! ha!). And at the end of Doomsday Rose does let go (their tethered on). There that makes sense doesn't it now.

Here goes!!

NEW YORK- 

Spider-man was happy, (well not happy as such for him anything other than miserable and pissed is classed as happy). He had a web pouch with money fresh for J. Jonah Jameson. Money from pictures of his latest battles against Doc Ock who was now safely behind bars.

"I wonder how Jameson would feel if he knew he was funding Spider-man," he said quietly to himself as he web swinged to the next building. Sticking to the pole on top of said building he laughed quietly to himself at the expression on Jameson's face. "He'd probably go purple, or explode or something" he thought laughing a little louder. But just loud enough to scare some birds away from where they were resting.

Spider-man followed the bird's flight with his eyes for a while, before gazing down on the city he was sworn to protect. He saw dozens of people going about there daily lives, going to work, taking their children shopping, having coffee. He briefly wondered how many of these people's lives he had saved in one way or another, before quickly pushing the thought aside. This wasn't the right time he was still on patrol. Even though he had put Doc Ock (among others) in jail soon that didn't mean that there wasn't any crime. With a small almost inaudible sigh he got up from his half-sitting, half-lying position standing still for a minute trying to decide where to patrol next, a second later he nodded his head as if he'd decided. He leaned forward and jumped, in a way that put an Olympic gymnast to shame. Just for kicks he decided to swing past the Daily Bugle building, specifically Jameson's office.

"Expensive Cuban cigars 50 bucks, ugly tie 30 bucks, the look on Jameson's face as I swing past...priceless" Spidey joked to himself, whilst swinging over to the next building. Laughing softly to himself, and wondering in the back of his head when the old Parker luck would kick in.

THE TARDIS

It was a normal day traveling in the TARDIS (well it's normal for people traveling in the TARDIS, but it would be very weird for anyone not used to this way of life). Only a few aliens and planet saving escapades.

The Doctor was at the console of his precious TARDIS, pressing buttons that didn't necessarily needed to be pressed. He stood there silently but with a huge grin on his face. He had one hand in his jacket pocket, the other doing the button pressing.

Laughter trickled in from another room, "Oh so that's where Rose and Jack had gotten to" he murmured to himself. Moving his left hand from his pocket to push his slipping glasses back on his nose. Muttering to himself he leaned over the console tapping the screen slightly.

"Now why are you making swirls? Why would you be doing that for? Don't make swirls at me!" he asked. Scratching his head with his right hand, and putting his left hand back in his pocket he stood up. Taking his glasses off and chewing on one of the ears, with a thoughtful expression on his face. Wondering whether the swirls where a good thing or a bad thing.

Before he could come to any conclusion his revere was by a large shake. Quickly grabbing on to a rail he, swiftly checked to see if there was any damage.

"Doctor?" said a worried voice right behind him, it was Rose. He hadn't even noticed that she had even come in, let alone that she was right behind him.

"What's wrong?" Jack added in standing a few meters behind Rose. The Doctor put his glasses back on, and used that hand to instead scratch his head again. "I don't really know" turning around suddenly he went back to tapping at the screen. Rose and Jack moved to stand next to him both looking at the screen.

"What do the swirls mean?" asked Rose looking at the Doctor and noticing his slightly furrowed brow.

"It means either someone's coming or..." he trailed on tapping the screen a few more times. "Or what...?" Jack pressed.

"That or something's coming" The Doctor finished there was a long silence as everyone considered this. This silence was broken by another even bigger shudder in the TARDIS.

"Whoa that one was even bigger that the last one" said Jack.

"Yeah it was" The Doctor agreed than for the first time noticing what his friends were wearing. "Jack, Rose ...what are you wearing?" he asked in an amused voice.

Jack and Rose both looked down at the clothes they were wearing then at each others before all three of them broke out in laughter. It seemed that they had forgotten what they were wearing too.

Jack was wearing a clown suit with an old-fashioned dive suit helmet under his arm. Rose was wearing a large oversized orange shirt and flare pants with Jack's clown shoes.

Unfortunately their fun was cut short by another large shudder. The TARDIS made a strange noise; The Doctor turned to the console and pressed all sorts of buttons. "What's going on?" Rose asked The Doctor, but this time Jack answered "we're changing direction". He answered before rushing to help the Doctor, "changing direction to where?" was the last thing Rose had time to think before also rushing to help.


	2. Ha ha

Chapter Two

Well here's chapter two if anybodies actually reading this they'll have to tell me what hey think. I think its, good and I sure as hell hope so. But crappiness has had this nasty habit of sneaking up on me lately. If there;s any spelling mistakes then sorry. Let me know 'kay!

Anyway this is the part where I make you laugh with my fantastic humor but I really can't think of anything really. If you want funny headings look up Gyte-sans Wormholes and Loopholes now that's funny!

NEW YORK  
-note from the TARDIS part to this part only a few minutes has passed-

The sun beat down on New York and all it's inhabitants. It wasn't particularly hot day but wasn't freezing either. "Yeah great idea to make your costume out of spandex Spidey" Spider-man said to himself while landing on the side of a building taking a breather.

" 'Cause you know that nothing breathes better than spandex, and it's great in hot weather!" he berated himself.

He moved to a side of the building that faced away from the main road below, and slowly peeled off his full-face mask. His hair was slightly damp with sweat and the cooler air felt good on his face. Taking a few deep breaths he checked his watch. He stared at it for a while before deciding he had time for a few minutes. And just as he decided on this he heard the sound of a scream in the alleyway just beneath him.

Quickly pulling his mask back on, he sprang back into action.

"Hey there", he said to the would-be mugger a man in his late forties wearing all black. About to mugg a young women in her 20's. He landed right in front of the mugger, neatly putting himself between the mugger and the young women.

"I can tell you right now that bag would never go with the rest of your outfit" he joked. The mugger pulled a knife and came at the friendly neighborhood Spider-man. He easily dodged the attack, and as the mugger passed him Spidey could smell alcohol on his breath "another alchy" he thought.

The women behind him was frozen in fear, she was clutching her red handbag like it was a lifeline. Her eyes were darting between the mugger and Spider-man. She looked dangerously close to crying, or worse a mental breakdown.

After the mugger's failed attack he had run straight into a group of dustbin and looked very woozy. Which seemed to prove Spidey's theory that he was drunk. Seeing this as a chance to get her out of there, Spidey turned around. "Run, don't worry I'll take care of this moron" he said pointed his thumb to the mugger struggling to get up.

The women nodded a couple of times, biting her lips "thanks" she whispered before running out of the alley.

"Well let's take care of this moron, I mean I never break my promise to a pretty girl" Spidey thought to himself. He and the mugger (or drunk moron as Spidey had begun to think of him as) had a _very _short fight. Short for two reasons one the guy was drunk, and two it's SPIDEY we're talking about here. And in two shakes of a Scorpions tail the would-be mugger was in a web-net.

"In Soviet Russia you don't beat Spidey, Spidey beat you!" he said while dusting his hands of invisible dust, in a fake crappy Russian accent. And just as he was enjoying a rare moment of self satisfaction at a job well done. Spidey heard the sound of a siren in the distance "it's never a quiet moment is it?" he asked himself full aware that there wasn't an answer and never would be. Before leaping off to save yet more lives.

TARDIS

Meanwhile Rose, The Doctor and Jack were having problems of their own. If you've never had to control a misbehaving TARDIS, then you have no idea how hard it is. Right now The Doctor and co. was trying a tried a tested approach, pressing random buttons and occasionally hitting it with a mallet.

"Doctor, do you think hitting it with a mallet will work at all?" Jack asked The Doctor while trying to hold something down that he thought either made omelets or controlled the shields. He wasn't sure and didn't feel like taking a chance.

"You know I'm not sure, it's worked before but that could have been pure coincidence" was his answer. "Cryptic as usual" thought Jack. At this point in time all three-time travelers were in strange positions to try and make the TARDIS work. Jack was leaning over Rose somewhere underneath the console, and the Doctor was somewhere in between. Still even with the impending danger all three had huge grins plastered on their faces.

The TARDIS made another strange noise "what does that sound mean?" asked Rose in a muffled voice.

The Doctor stood up straight and apparently gave up "it means that there's nothing we can do".

Rose and Jack also stopped what they were doing.

"What do you mean? That we just go wherever the TARDIS goes and play along?" asked Jack in a half-amused, half-worried voice. The huge grin still plastered on his face.

"More or less, that's the fun part isn't it?" The Doctor replied his grin just as wide as Jack's.

"Sounds good" Rose agreed, her grin as wide as that of her friends. "What do we do while we're waiting?" she asked looking at The Doctor then Jack.

"Well I can think of a few things..." Jack suggested giving Rose a strange look. Which of course earned him a nasty look from Rose and a smack over the head from The Doctor.

"I meant, we could change back into our normal clothes" he amended with a sheepish look.

"Yeah right" said Rose. "But he has a point" said the Doctor. "You can't walk around like that," he said looking pointedly at Rose's clothes. And then at Jack's.

"Yeah" Rose agreed giggling a little "but nothing else" she said to Harkness. He put his hands up in surrender.

They walked out laughing and pushing each other back to the costume room. The Doctor was also laughing to himself "humans" he thought to himself. Pushing his glasses up on his nose. But he hadn't revealed everything about the TARDIS's misbehaving. The reading's he'd had were identical to that of the ones they'd seen from the battle at Canary Wharf. The Doctor pushed the thought away quickly, he'd almost lost Rose that day never again ever. He would keep her safe, he owed it to Jackie. Among other things.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Wow, I've gotten to a third chapter and it's still making sense I haven't trailed off and started talking about bunnies or anything, anyway bunnies are so cute...damn so close. Anyway I hope everything's making sense so far. And my sister's teaching me the wonders of grammar.

She actually threatened to tie me to a chair, and pin my eyes open unless used proper grammar!

Anyway please review; it's my reason for living!!

NEW YORK  
When Spidey got on the scene it was already chaotic; there were people all over the place. At first he couldn't see the object of all this chaos. Then, "oh crap" was all he had to say. It seemed that the once great scientist Doc Ock was free...again.

"Why do I even bother?" Spider-man asked himself, of course he knew _why. _"With great power, comes great responsibility" he said under his breath. With a sigh barely more volume than his earlier sigh, he leaped into battle.

TARDIS

When Rose and Jack came back in The Doctor was standing there as if he was incredibly bored, and had been waiting for _hours._

Which of course he hadn't, all and all he'd been waiting roughly 15 minutes. Rose and Jack were wearing much more normal clothes. Without even a hint of clown.

"About time" the Doctor chided, making a huge show of checking his watch and tapping his watch. Rose bumped into him, "I'm so sorry" she replied in a joking voice.

As the trio left Rose thought about the Doctor, he looked worried back there, and he was spacing out a bit more than usual. Rose hoped he was okay. She looked up and realized that Jack was giving her a strange look, realising that she had spaced out she smiled at him to reassure him that she was okay.

He grinned back at her and then she, Jack and the Doctor joined hands and walked in an indiscriminate direction.

"Where are we going?' she and Jack asked almost in unison. "Oh well..." said the Doctor scratching his head with his spare hand "I don't know really" he finished. Looking at Jack and Rose as if waiting for them.

"Ooh, I've gotten an idea," said Jack who wanted to raise his hand but couldn't because he was holding Rose's and the Doctor's hands. "How about we wander around until we hear the sound of a person screaming".

"Shouldn't be long" said Rose "our record for being in any given place without having to race to someone in need is...about 5 minutes". Just then as if the universe had responded to Rose's statement they heard the sound of a distant scream. They stared at each other for about a second, before racing off to help.

Well that one was a little shorter than what I usually write but next chapter The Doctor and co. meet Spidey.

It'll be dramatic so I hope you'll like it!

Anyway review!!


	4. unImaginative name!

Chapter Four

Ahhhhhhh!! My Computer crashed!! I just wrote this bloody chapter and now I have to do it again!!

This sucks!!

Anyway here's the chapter!!

NEW YORK/TARDIS destination

Spidey jumped a couple of meters behind Doc Ock, his feet hitting hard the concrete pavement. Surveying the scene he deduced ( "ha ha deduced" he thought) that Doc Ock was in the process of robbing a scientific research center. But he couldn't quite see the name, because of all of Doc Ock's flailing arms.

"Hey there", he greeted Doc Ock's back. Doc Ock stopped what he was doing (picking up large bags of unmarked bags).

"You!" he accused saying that one word like it was the worst insult imaginable. "I should have crushed you like the bug you are, years ago!" he practically yelled. Reaching out with his metal arms at Spidey.

He easily dodged them all, although one of them knocked over a lamp post nearly hitting an onlooker.

As Spidey dodged Doc Ock's attacks he joked, "Oh Doc Ock I'm so ashamed I thought you'd know that spiders are arachnids, not bugs". Shaking his head as if he was ashamed in some way of the scientist.

"And I thought you were a scientist!" he mocked in his most patronizing voice, smiling under his full-face mask.

"I'll squish you whatever you are! Your as good as dead!" Doc Ock seethed trying again to squish Spidey, unsuccessfully of course.

"Interesting," said a voice from the crowd. Momentarily distracted from their fight and stared at the source of the strange statement.

The source was a man that looked in about his thirties wearing a pin-stripe suit. He was leaning his foot on the Police made brocade. Leaning over he was wearing white sneakers, and glasses. He was pointing a small device at Spidy and Doc Ock. There were two people also leaning with him, a young blonde girl wearing jeans and a pink shirt. And a man wearing what appeared to be World War Two army clothes, all three were grinning.

Doc Ock walked over to the trio. His temper already frayed by Spidey seemed to be in no mood for strange, ...well strangers. He walked over to the one who had made the initial outburst and pressed grabbed his neck with one of his tentacles. Lifting him from the ground.

Spidey leapt over and attempted to reason with Doc Ock "hey Doc, your battle is with me, so how about we..."

But Spidey was cut off by the stranger, apparently very calm despite his predicament.

"So?" he asked "how does this tentacle thingy work then?" "Are they molded to your body?" he asked not waiting for an answer. " Because it that's how it happened it must have hurt ... a lot".

"As if you could ever understand" Doc Ock sniped in his typical manner.

"Oh I think I could, but no matter I'll figure it out I like a puzzle" then he signaled almost in perceptively to male friend on his right.

At the signal his friend jumped on Doc Ock's back and held on for dear life. "Get off me you fool" Doc Ock yelled shaking trying to get the man off his back.

Spider-man seeing his chance grabbed some of Doc Ock's arms. The stranger handed his friend on Doc Ock's back the small device he'd been using earlier.

"Setting 5" the man barely whispered out. And that's when Spidey realised that Doc Ock's grip must have been slowly tightening.

Then he heard a shrill whirring noise, he looked at the man on Doc Ock's back. He was undoing his tentacles. Just as he was marveling he felt a tug on Doc Ock's tentacle he turned to see who was pulling.

It was the girl, she smiled and him and helped hold Doc Ock still.

They both turned to look at the man's process he'd gotten off all the arms except for the one that Spidey (and the girl) were holding. And the one around the man's neck.

And in a second later that one was gone too. Doc Ock realising that he only had one arm left fought with all his might and freed it from Spidey and the girl. Using his newly acquired arm he used it to knock the man off his back. Sending him flying.

Meanwhile the man he'd had in a chokehold was free and breathing deeply. He was bending over taking very deep breaths.

Then he stood up straight "ouch" he said rubbing his neck "that really hurt".

"You should be dead," said Doc Ock "no-one except Spider-man had survived that before". He said in disbelief. Stepping back.

And that moment was all that Spidey need to knock him out. The girl rushed to the man asking if he was all right. "Oh I'm fine" he replied, "but what about Jack?"

They all looked to where the man had been flung. The man and the girl knelt by him, taking his pulse while Spidey stood nearby.

"Dead" said the man in the suit.

Spider-man was instantly sorry for them he should have been able to stop this.

Just as he was about to apologise they both stood up and started counting down.

"What are you doing?" Spidey asked.

The man smiled at him "any second now" he said.

"For what?" asked Spider-man. Wondering what he was supposed to be waiting for.

Just then the dead man on the ground took a huge breath and sat up. "Ow," he said "well at least it's a new one". He said, "Usually it's just gunshot wounds".

Looking at his friends he motioned for them to help him up. And in the process they almost all fell over.

"How did you do that?" asked Spider-man completely thrown.

"Oh did I not mention?" said the dead and then not dead man "I can't die, funny story actually".

"Who are you three anyway?" Spider-man asked.

"I'm the Doctor," said the man in the pin stripe suit. "I'm Captain Jack Harkness," said the other man.

"And I'm Rose Tyler" said the girl.

And that's how they met, done!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

I've written these chapters one after the other, it exits the window every time I try to upload it. It's so annoying. Anyway here's Chapter Five enjoy.

NEW YORK

City Library (the one where Peter was supposed to be in the first movie but instead he went to that wrestling match, yeah that one).

The Doctor, Rose, Jack and Spider-man where gathered around a table looking at a map of the city.

"Oh" said the Doctor "this is before they installed the teleporters".

"Teleporters?" asked Spider-man

"Don't ask" Jack replied.

"Hey" said Rose "You know what I realised this is the first time I've been to New York without meeting a cat-nurse".

"It is isn't it" The Doctor replied grinning at her, she grinned right back at him.

"Again, don't ask" Jack advised.

"Well this is the subway" said Spidey wincing slightly while pointing at a space in the map.

"Bad memories?" asked Jack.

"Something like that" said Spider-man "have you ever tried to stop a speeding - train by yourself?"

"Not personally, no"

"Well it hurts...a lot". Spidey shrugged "that's the Daily Bugle" pointing to a space nearby to the subway"

"And that's the state prison, for the super-villains".

"It holds Dr. Doom, Green Goblin, Hobgoblin and Doc Ock among others".

"So that's where we're going" said Jack as a statement not a question.

They heard people talking behind them

"Who are they Drew?" a woman asked someone called Drew. "I don't know who the other three are Mavis,

but that ones Spider-man".

"You mean that criminal that the Daily Bugles always talking about".

"Oh crap", said Spider-man.

"Criminal?" asked Jack looking at Spider-man.

"Drew they heard us talking, you'd better call the police".

"On it Mavis"

"No need" said a new voice. It was a Police-man with his gun already out "hands up" he said the man.

"Hey that's no fair" said Spider-man raising his hands "I saved you from a burning building last week".

"Hey I hate to interrupt but what's going on?' asked The Doctor steeping between Spider-man and the Police-man.

"This man has been causing all sorts of trouble" said the Police-man.

"Yeah like saving your life!".

"What kind of trouble?" asked the Doctor.

"I don't know just trouble, he's a criminal".

"How so?" asked Rose moving to stand next to The Doctor.

"Thanks for the help" said Spidey quietly to Jack who had moved to stand next to him.

"But I'm gonna go now".

And just like that Spidey webbed out of the room.

"Oh you let him get away". Said the Police-man walking away.

"Well we know where he'll be" said the Doctor.

"Oh really where" asked Jack.

"The prison" Rose answered.

End of chapter.

REVIEW


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